Parents: At What Age do you Stop going to your Child’s Bus Stop?

My children are still in grade school and they take the bus to school. Our stop has a variety of children from kindergarten to sixth grade taking the bus. Some other parents (or grandparents, or babysitters) congregate at the bus stop, while others can’t, or choose not to.  I am fortunate enough that my schedule allows me to be at the bus stop with them in the mornings. On days that I can’t make it to the stop, I usually send a text to another parent or two asking them to please keep an eye on my children and to please let me know if they are doing anything that is inappropriate in my absence. (It takes a village!)  I also know a handful of parents seem surprised that I still go down to the stop nearly every morning.

Like many kids, my children tell me that I don’t need to go to the bus stop with them. In fact, some moms of older kids tell me that it is “un-cool” to be at the bus stop. Part of me would love to not have to leave the house, especially in the cold or the rain, but the other half of me, continually hears and sees things at the bus stop that usually lead to a conversation that needs to be had after the kids get home from school, or during dinner conversation. (As many others, my kids are a continual work-in-progress and continually need to be molded and taught how to be respectable human beings.)

Sure, kids will be kids, but right when I think I don’t need to, or shouldn’t go down to the stop anymore, something happens, or is said, that leads me to believe I still need to be around and address things with my children.

My concerns can sometimes have to do with safety issues like “Get out of the street while you are waiting for the bus!”

I have heard kids using words like “gay” in an inappropriate context, or trying to “school others” of what it means to be gay – many time in front of younger and impressionable ears with wrong information being provided.

Recently another child used the word “racist” in a negative way as he stated that he “wanted to watch something on his phone that was racist.” Also said in front of impressionable ears.

The other day I saw an unattended child licking rocks. (I can’t make this up.)  She thought she was being cute and said that they tasted like saw dust. Some of us parents tried to discourage her by telling her that they were dirty, but that didn’t stop her.

Many kids have devices these days, as do many kids at our stop, (mine still don’t – I know, that makes me “un-cool” again!) and I have seen them on their phones discussing how they are registering for things that they need to be over the age of 18 for. As a reminder, a few of these children are 12, but many are younger. (Chalk that up to different rules, different families, I guess.)

In the past I’ve heard children at our stop talk about world events and tragedies in heartless and at times, brash tones. They are children and have a lot to learn, and families address such events in different ways in their own homes, but I have found myself chiming in to these conversations when necessary.

I’ve seen a young child at our stop take things like fruit out of his or her lunch box and throw it at other children. Once it is thrown, it is left on the ground unless another parent suggests that it gets picked up.

Perhaps my bus stop is one of the worst ones in town? (Probably not.)

Or maybe all bus stops have a little of this going on? (Probably so.)

Kids will be kids, but I feel that they are continually a work-in-progress and they need pruning along the way.

 I don’t know about you, but I choose to continue to be an “un-cool” parent and keep my eyes and ears on my children as well as those around them – At least for a little longer.

So I ask, “At What Age do you Stop going to your Child’s Bus Stop?” You can reply in the comments section below or join the discussion on Facebook at: https://www.facebook.com/JoinTheDiscussionCoffeeConversationTransformation/

Strengthen your Emotional Power with this quick, little Exercise!

We all have people in our lives who get under our skin or irritate our spirit from time to time. Maybe for you it is a co-worker, a relative, an Ex, or a busy-body neighbor who is always in your business.
Would you like to elevate your vibration and remove confusion or disorder between you and another? I have a quick, little exercise that you can do anywhere: I want you to send *love* to three people who are bothering you. At first, this may not be easy, but you will feel freer every time you do it. When you practice sending love to your enemies, you are practicing compassion.
Send Love - REVISED2When you do this exercise,  you are strengthening your emotional power.
Easy?
No.
Freeing?
Yes!
It doesn’t mean that you suddenly become friends with your enemy, but when you harbor anger or hate, you may notice things like repeated problems in your life, illness, debt, insomnia and even injury, just to name a few. Why hang on to that? Let that go!
Also, when you practice compassion, you raise your vibration. When you raise your vibration, you also raise the vibration that is in your home, your family, your neighborhood, your town, your state, your country and even the vibration of the planet. Yup! That’s right!
Give this little exercise a try and feel free to drop me a line and tell me how it worked for you.
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What if You Put Yourself “On a Break” Before Starting a New Relationship?

I am a firm believer that lessons are continually taught until they are learned. I feel that this thought also extends in to relationships. Not just romantic relationships, but friendships as well.  Processing past relationships, before moving on to the next one, can help you to evolve and prevent you from repeating previous mistakes. And honestly, there is positive in all relationships.

Many of us have been there before, myself included. You barely get out of one relationship before you are on to the next. Sometimes we have someone in the works before we end one relationship. We like to have a “back up.” Sometimes we started a new relationships before ending the previous one. We glide from one to the next basically because we can ignore any pain or accountability in between. It helps our ego to not feel alone or to be alone. It helps us to fulfill social engagements and helps others to feel “successful” on some level. But sooner or later… the continuous motion of going from one relationship to the next eventually hits us in the face, if we don’t hit rock bottom first. When any relationship comes to an end, it can affect us mentally, emotionally, and physically. Sometimes it is just the most recent relationship that we need to face and deal with, and other times, if we have ignored what went wrong in past relationships, we have more work to do as there are more issues and emotions that need to come to the surface and be dealt with.

When you give yourself some time in between each relationship, you allow yourself time to heal and to reflect. For most, this isn’t fun. Sitting in silence… single…and alone…can be defining for some. Giving yourself “time” before jumping into another friendship, relationship, or even casually dating again, gives you a chance to see what was good and bad about your past relationship that you can either change or pull forward into the next one.

relationshipsFor example, is there something about your last friend or partner that you won’t put up with again in a future relationship? What about your friend(s) or partner(s) before that? Can you see a trend of what you are putting up with or what you are overlooking in a relationship? Do you have a “type” and is that “type” no really a good fit for you? What can YOU do better or differently in a relationship? Are you contributing to the failing of your relationships and do you have patterns that you need to break so that history doesn’t keep repeating itself?

I recently had a client who could not stand being single. This person had a job and a family to take care of but was still always looking to be out and about, for something to do and for someone to be with. My suggestion to my client was to grab a couple of books. They didn’t need to be anything in particular, just whatever was of interest at the time and to spend “alone” time reading for the next few months. The weather was nice so I suggested that the reading could take place outside or by a pool. Another suggestion I had was to take up a hobby or to take a class. Nothing expensive, but just the intention to learn or to explore something new. To other clients, I suggest things like exercise. Nothing serious, if that isn’t their thing, but even 20 minutes a day walking, or trying some yoga can help to fill your time as well as to help you focus mentally.

My best advice to anyone who has just ended a relationship is for you to allow yourself the time you need to see what lessons your last relationship has brought to your attention. Each relationship you have had has taught you something. Maybe it is something good. Maybe it is something not-so-good. Either way, you need to take that information and grow! But this can’t happen if you are off and running into a new relationship.

 

Have you put yourself “on a break” before moving on to another relationship? What did you learn about yourself? What did you discover about your relationship patterns? You can reply in the comments section below or join the discussion on Facebook at: //www.facebook.com/HealRiseUpandAscend/